Showing posts with label food. Show all posts
Showing posts with label food. Show all posts

23 December 2016

Pre-Christmas Crazy

Yesterday was a DAY.

Ran around and did errands. That whole you-waited-until-the-last-minute-to-shop thing that I do every year (even when I tell myself I won't). Someday I need to write a post about my procrastination habits. Like how today is December 23rd and I am just now addressing my Holiday Cards.

Hour long workout at the gym after errands. I love my trainer. I do. But I hadn't had a full workout since before the last week of school. And for the last two weeks I've been madly grading. While sitting on the couch. And it is the cookie time of the year. So yesterday I squatted and jumped and pulled up and slammed balls and lifted weights and at the end of an hour I was toast.

Then I went off to the Red Cross to donate platelets. Now, I donate blood all the time, but have never done the platelet thing before. How hard could it be? Sit in a comfy chair for two hours and don't move your arms. Blood out one arm into machine to be separated and red blood put back into other arm--easy, right? Apparently I do not sit still well. I kept setting off the machine's alarm. Sigh.

After 3 1/2 hours, exhausted, I go home to Best Beloved who (bless him!) made me dinner (new panini grill to play with!). Then I veg on the couch a bit, craving Bailey's but drinking eggnog (calcium and fluid, but no alcohol). Sore all over and, by the way don't lift anything heavy for 72 hours. But then Daughter and Granddaughter stopped by and who can resist lifting and hugging an adorable two-year-old? I did go early to bed. Today, however, I still feel like I've been beaten with a rubber hose. Arms sore as all heck, but is that from the donation or from the workout? (My trainer is a slave driver and he made me lift a lot!) 

Today more errands. Make cookies. Make pies. Precook dinner for Saturday. And then maybe to the zoo with Best Beloved for the lights at night.

Good news? I can now drink again.

03 January 2015

Hello 2015!

Here we are facing another year! As years go, 2014 kinda sucked. Too much chaos in my work situation. Too many complications in relationships. Too much left undone. But now in thinking about 2015, I think it can only go up from here. Amazing how each new year brings with it the idea of a clean slate and a chance to start fresh.

I always say I am not going to make resolutions and then each year I feel guilty for that. Not this year. This year I am making resolutions... but I refuse right now, up front, to feel any guilt if people or events or things don't turn out as I hope they will! I will take this year one day at a time. This year I will be me... just me. Take me or leave me, I don't need to live up to anyone else's expectations, just my own.

So here they are, My Resolutions, fifteen of them for the year--not in any particular order:
  1. I will write one poem per week. More if I am so inspired. And I will send them out to be published weekly, too.
  2. I will finish the second manuscript. 
  3. I will lose 20 pounds. Seriously! I will visit the gym more!
  4. I will Detox on occasion and eat healthier and mindfully.
  5. I will clean my house better. At least one room per week; a very thorough cleaning.
  6. I will paint two (maybe three) bedrooms upstairs and finish the copper work in the kitchen. 
  7. I will get rid of clutter by selling off or giving away collectables and books I don't need. 
  8. I will read at least 200 books.
  9. I will spend (at least) one evening a week with my partner, having some quality time. 
  10. I will do one cultural thing a month (museum, concert, galley opening).
  11. I will do (or try to limit myself to) one alternate fun event a month (SCA, Steampunk, cosplay). 
  12. I will finally get back to writing on the novel.
  13. I will finish my freelance assignments before deadline!
  14. I will blog more this year!
  15. Last but hardly least, I will not worry about things I cannot control....
As I have been writing this, my 5 year old granddaughter has been dancing around the room singing the "Let it Go" song from Frozen, and I think this just might be my theme song for the coming year...


This will be a good year. I won't have it any other way! You have a good year, too!

21 January 2014

Pennsic Living

Someone I love said to me that his camping days are over, implying that this is roughing it. Pennsic is a different animal. This isn't ordinary camping. I have a yurt with oriental rugs and a queen sized bed piled with furs and pillows. Enough candles to light Versailles. A kitchen set-up as good as home.

In fact, the best thing about Pennsic is that I get to cook. I actually have time to cook. Last night's dinner was grilled teriyaki marinated pork loin, garlic butter rice, tossed salad with fresh tomatoes, olive oil and balsamic vinegar dressing.

Breakfast today was chocolate filled croissants, fresh strawberries, and Gevalia Stockholm Roast coffee. This is decadent-living-style camping.

Tonight, steaks on the campfire, fingerling potatoes with fresh rosemary, corn on the cob, baby watermelon for dessert.

And then there is the food court here. You can get anything from Middle Eastern delicacies to ice cream, from Medieval stews in bread bowls to killer burgers. Yesterday I found one of the beverage places can do iced mocha smoothies.

Oh, you could live on hotdogs and Gatorade if you wanted to, but what fun is that compared to Cornish game hens stuffed with pears and raisins, wrapped in bacon and tin foil and baked slowly over a campfire the served with a nice Chablis?

01 September 2011

Un-mindful vs Mindful Eating

Went out to dinner (for sushi and Thai) last night with friends and ate so much I felt bloated. Trying to figure out why I do that. Some part of it is that I can't bear to waste food. I grew up in the era of "clean your plate." I remember lectures from my dad on how there were starving children in other parts of the world and owed it to them to appreciate the food I had. Some of it is about loving to cook and make really good food and the joy of sharing it with others.

This morning somehow I am down 2 lbs from yesterday. I should feel good about that, however, my jeans are still too tight. And I know those 2 lbs will creep back somewhere. Over the past 2 years I have put on too much weight. Some of it is the desk job making me spend more time sitting at the computer. Some if it is sitting in front of the TV where running to the refrigerator on the commercial break gets to be a habit.

Whatever it is I still want to lose 20 lbs. And cleaning my plate at the restaurant is not going to help.

Last night my friend Michelle mentioned she feels that she does "binge eating"--the habit of just eating because it's there, because your taste-buds are bored, not because you need food. Binge eaters eat because they are stressed and want to feel good and, lets face it, good food tastes good and makes you feel good. I don't think I eat because I feel stressed, but I know I am not overeating because I need the food. To be honest, I can't remember the last time I felt hunger pains or felt my stomach rumbling.

My friend Lisa talks about "Mindful Eating." The idea that you choose to eat deliberately--for nourishment, for the sensation of taste, for the beauty of the food and the joy of the moment. I like that. I was thinking I need to pay more attention to whether I am eating out of boredom or out of a real need for food. I like that whole concept. I need to remember to savor the food, not wolf it down like I am starving.

Earlier this year I started keeping a food diary at Fat Secret. This is something Steve's nutritionist told him to do. Just to be aware of what you eat and drink. I was really faithful with it for a while, then in August I got lazy and and busy and just didn't. I'm going back to it again, but I have to admit I don't know if it helps to be aware of the calories in all the foods I eat. I also find the sheer caloric count in prepared foods disturbing. Why do restaurants serve such large portions? Why do I still feel the need to clean my plate after all these years?

Lisa always begins her restaurant eating experience by dividing the food on her plate and asking for a box to take home half of it. Then she's not tempted to just keep eating until it is all gone. I may have to start doing that.

I also need to ask myself more often if I am hungry or if my taste-buds are just bored.

30 September 2009

China Week will be Oct. 5-9 : The University of Akron News

China Week will be Oct. 5-9 : The University of Akron News

The University of Akron and its Confucius Institute, and faculty, staff and student body will present a series of free public events focused on China’s culture, politics, economy, history and language during China Week, Oct. 5-9, at the UA campus.

For a complete events schedule, visit China Week. For more information, call 330-972-8411 or e-mail haverkamp@uakron.edu.

Shared via AddThis

03 July 2009

Spicing up the Cod

Sharing a great recipe here that my friend Dan sent in an email today. Now, as my tomatoes come in and the cilantro in the garden gets bigger, and if my neighbor Jeff heads out on his boat on the 4th and brings home a mess of fish. . . . Anyway, here is Dan's recipe:

We have a farmers' market here in town on Wednesdays. Small, but good stuff. And things you don't get at the grocery store - like oak leaf lettuce, which we all really like. So I went this past Wednesday and got some produce along with hitting the fish monger. There are these two women who have a stand there with the freshest damn fish I've every had. Last week I got dover sole, which I love. . . . Was hoping for sea bass, but they're not really in season, so I got cod. Yeah. Not exciting. But wait. Took an onion, green pepper, red pepper, garlic, jalapeno pepper, and two tomatoes (sounds like a start on salsa) all chopped up and tossed in a hot pan with olive oil. Added salt, pepper, cayenne pepper, cumin, and fresh cilantro. (To be accurate, the tomatoes were held out a bit and the cilantro went in dead last.) Let it all cook down and brown up a bit. Put in a dash of vegetable stock and the juice from half a lime and half a lemon. Cleared a spot in the middle of the pan. Slipped the cod filets in and put a lid on the whole mess. Did I mention the brown rice was almost ready? Fish and rice with my salsa-stuff on top. Salad of oak leaf lettuce and fresh avocado. Cooking is such fun.

Anyone hungry yet?

22 April 2009

Love me because of who I am not in spite of who I am

Shakespeare said:

Let me not to the marriage of true minds
Admit impediments. Love is not love
Which alters when it alteration finds. . . .


Which is exactly the subject of this blog post from Stinky Angels. Well said, Jae and Bill!

Because of.... Sunday, April 12, 2009 [from Stinky Angels]

For anyone who is counting, today is Andreas' and my 6 year wedding anniversary. That makes it the 12 year anniversary of our first date. (Yes, we did that on purpose. Too cutesy?)

Back at the very beginning I created a phrase that described how I wanted to love and be loved, and Andreas and I have subscribed to this philosophy ever since. I said that I wanted someone who would love me "because of, not in spite of" the way that I am, and I'd do the same in return.

If I were to love everything about him except the one or two things, then I'd constantly be trying to "fix" him. If he were to love me "even though" I am one way or another, then he'd wonder when I was going to change. Instead, we try to accept each other exactly as we are, and love all of those things that are the hardest to love.

Andreas has loved me because of my big heart, my love of animals, my joy of life, but also because of my (occasional) sharp-tongued jabs at his expense, and the way I smell (stinky) after two days of not showering because being a mommy sometimes means I forget to be a (clean) wife.

In return, I have loved him for the way he sees humor in everything, his ability to keep me calm and sane, and the way he can make friends with anyone, but also the (sometimes maddening) way that he volunteers out his time to anyone who needs help even if I need him at home, and how he (usually, but not always, correctly) thinks he knows the best way to accomplish any task.
Now we have Eme (whose 14 month "birthday" was yesterday) in our lives. There are days (though they are very few) when we might wish that she would be different than the way she is (please, please, PLEASE sleep through the night). But we love her. Just as she is.

We love Emelie because...

she is very good at making us laugh.
she is amazingly smart.
she almost never lets us take naps.
she learns new things every day.
she gets excited by anything that moves by itself (trucks, cats, leaves, whatever).
she says "mama" and "dada" and means us.
she loves us.
she sometimes stinks.
she knows how to spit her food out (see Cuffs and Peaches).
she enjoys singing and dancing.
she enjoys spinning around in circles until she falls down.
she enjoys doing very unladylike things even when we're in public (see The F Bomb).
she's usually sweet and gentle.
she's sometimes not sweet and gentle.
she's awesome.

For all of these reasons and more, we love our beautiful, stinky angel.

Posted by Jae at 12:21 PM

19 December 2008

On getting new windows

So this morning I wake up to a layer of ice on everything. And the window guys are due at 8 am. This would have have been way less of a problem back in November when windows should have happened. Still, new windows are going to be wonderful. Imagine...real windows you can see out of and that open AND close. Oh wait, you probably don't have to imagine... you probably have had functional windows for years. This house, however, was built in 1918. And up until, oh,1940 or '50 had perfectly good double-hung sash wood-framed windows that went up and down. No screens or storms, but energy was cheaper then and you just opened your windows in summer and closed them in winter. Somewhere along the way a previous owner caulked most of the window shut, probably due to heating costs going up. And somewhere along the way the ones that did open developed warpage and leaks. In one window in the den there is a gap I can put a pencil through. Now I am worrying; will they be able to put in windows in the freezing icy rain?

A little after 9 am, three guys show up in a pick-up truck with the five big picture windows. And right off there is a conflict. These are single hung windows, but the paperwork says they should be double hung. Check in with the boss and they find the order was changed because the windows (62" wide) were too big to be doubles and had to be special made singles. In fact we had had the order changed twice (hence the not getting them installed until now). And so the project begins.

First I have to round up 4 very pissed cats who had their lives rearranged last night when we moved all furniture away from the windows. After encarcerating the cats on the 3rd floor in the library--with food, water and a litter box--we make coffee and put out gingersnaps for the workmen. Steve is running around like a kid at Christmas, watchng and asking all kinds of questions.

About 2 hours later the 3 big downstairs windows are in and more guys have shown up with the rest of the windows--straight from the manufacturer. The other thing that showed up was a brown (pitbull mix) puppy who thought he lived here. Men are going in and out of the house with windows and stuff. The dog who is wet, shivering, and trailing a very chewed up leash wants to get in the house, too. What ensues is a Keystone cop routine with Steve chasing the dog up down frozen steps.

On the leash now, Steve takes the dog around the block looking for the owner--no luck. Dog gets ensconced in the garage with a bowl of water, some cat food (better than nothing) and a pile of old towels. Dog wants company and so sets up barking like crazy. I call animal control and arrange for a pick-up. They will be around sometime today. . . maybe.

Workmen have the four bedrooms' windows in and are off to a late lunch. Eighteen windows to do and they have done 10 in 4 hours. I'm impressed. Oh, there is still caulking and wrapping the frames outside to do, but not bad. We turned the furnace off at the beginning of the job and despite the 33 degree weather with icy freezing rain outside the house, the temp inside has not dropped below 60. They pull a window out and replace it so fast it's like opening and closing a door.

Meanwhile I have made more coffee, cleaned up my email--which involves lots of phone calling to deal with a last minute change in meeting scheduling that no one told me about until today. Fortunately I had five whole hours left to fix the snafu before the university shut down entirely for break. Lucky me.

Dog is still barking. But down the street comes a kid looking for his lost dog. We happily reunite kid and dog, and immediately call animal control to cancel the pickup. Promptly 20 minutes later the animal control guy turns up at the door to take the dog away. No dog? Do we have any other problems? Stray anything? Must have been a slow day at the shelter.

Back to window guys. It's 3 pm and the siders have shown up. They begin wrapping all the window casements. Steve has now made up his own version of the "12 days of Christmas" that sums up the day:

12 guests soon coming,
11 rooms to clean up,
10 windows finished,
9 pots of coffee,
8 windows to go yet,
7 email crises,
6 plates of cookies
5 picture windows!
4 cats in the attic,
3 guys installing
2 siders siding
and a dog barking in the garage!

More coffee, more cookies. I am on my sixth cuppa today. The window job was supposed to take 2 days, it may only take a day and a half the workmen tell us. There is dust everywhere--not from the installation, rather from behind all the furniture that was moved. Ah well, a bit of vacuuming and we will be back to normal--better than before. Even the curtains have gone through the washer and look great. So some furniture moving and we will be ready for company at Christmas!

Well, we'll be ready once we finish the basement shower repairs that is. Oh and I still need to put a coat of paint on the powder room off the kitchen. No sweat. Really. We have two whole days next week to do that stuff!

15 December 2008

Chai Spiced Cookies

Just in time for holiday baking, Gillianne has sent me a recipe she found for "Chai Spiced Cookies"!

Chai-Spiced Cookies (makes about 30 cookies)

Fragrant with the classic flavors of chai tea, these buttery, crumbly cookies are perfect for dunking in a cup of tea or coffee.

Ingredients:
1/2 cup (1 stick) unsalted butter, softened
1/4 cup granulated sugar
1 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon ground ginger
1/2 teaspoon ground cloves
3/4 teaspoon ground cardamom
1/4 teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon vanilla extract
3/4 cup powdered sugar, sifted

Method:
Preheat oven to 350°F.
Beat butter with granulated sugar in a medium bowl until well blended. Stir in flour, spices, salt and vanilla until just combined. Scoop and roll dough into small teaspoon-sized balls and place about an inch apart on parchment paper-lined baking sheets. Bake until lightly golden, 15 to 20 minutes. Cool on the sheet for 5 minutes. Roll warm cookies in powdered sugar and let cool completely on a rack. Store in an airtight container. (Recipe Courtesy Whole Foods Market)

Thanks, Gillie!

14 November 2008

Ghosts and Cookies and Parents, Oh My!

My mother has gone round the bend. Totally.

Seems last night my mom called the cops because she heard "people in the house." Then she called my youngest brother, who called my sister, who wants me to come to Milwaukee right now and get my mother committed to a psych ward. Why any of this is a surprise to anyone I don't know. My mom is a drama queen. But today I thought I'd better call her and ask her what happened.

She tells me that ever since my dad went into the nursing home a couple weeks ago she's been hearing people walking around the house. And some times she sees them. Last night a whole crowd of them came up from the basement and went into my Dad's empty room and ate cookies in there and left crumbs on the bed. So she locked herself in her bedroom and stuck knives in the door frame to keep them from coming in. But then they looked at her through the windows so she called the police. Who (surprise!) found no evidence of people in, around, or near the house.

So I figure 1) she's just lonely and looking for company or 2) she's insecure and overreacting to house noises. So I tell her not to worry, it's just ghosts. She's always been fond of ghost stories. We have a whole family history of people who see ghosts. I suggest that she sprinkle salt on all the window sills and at the base of the doors to keep them out. She asks, "Will that work?" So I tell her it will if she "activates" it by standing in the middle of the house and saying the Lord's Prayer loudly 3 times after spreading the salt. She is relieved and says that she should have called me first and saved all the trouble . . . Because of course, I would know what to do . . . I'm the smart daughter after all.

I'm feeling a bit smug at this point and then she asks . . . Am I really certain this will keep ghosts out? So to cover my bases I say, "Well, only the bad ones. But you want visits from the good ones right? Like Aunt Evie, and Aunt Estelle, and Gramma? Salt won't keep them out. So if you hear any ghosts just remember they are just family ghosts." But, she then tells me, they make so much noise with their talking she can't sleep at night. So I tell her to go in the bathroom and turn on the water . . . just a tiny trickle, because everyone knows that ghosts can't cross running water, and that will keep them away from her bedroom so she won't hear them.

Now I am back to feeling smug, because I have given her a placebo. And some white noise. And with a little luck we will have no more phone calls to the police--at least until I can get out there and see how she is really doing. And, hell, if it is visitations from the spirit world, well, salt and prayers and running water fit in with the folklore of protection and certainly couldn't hurt. Mom's happy, I'm happy. . . and then she asks: "They see you through the screen, too, don't they?"

I'm thinking she's still talking about her ghosts, but, no, she's referring to the TV. Seems it is the weather people. She is certain they can see her. Because they smile at her. And when she smiles at them they smile back. "No, Mama," I tell her. "They smile all the time because they are on camera."

"No. I am sure they really see me," she says. "Watch this!"

I presume she is looking at a TV somewhere in her home in Wisconsin. I, however, am driving in my car in Ohio. "What am I supposed to be watching, Mom?" I ask.

"See that!" she proclaims in her "Ah Ha" voice--the one that she always used when we kids were caught raiding the cookies, or when she caught my dad with women's underwear in the backseat of his car. "I waved at the lady on the screen and she called over the man in the white shirt to look at me!" she announced proudly. "I'm sure they can see me. Do you think that's okay if they look at me?" she asked.

"Do you watch TV in your underwear?" I asked her. "No? Then don't worry about it, Mom."

So. My mother has lost it. Ghosts eat cookies in the other room keeping her up all night with their incessant chatter, and the TV weather people watch her through the TV screen.

Sigh.

I am so not looking forward to Thanksgiving.

20 September 2008

Saturday, Restaurants, and Hollandaise Sauce

Saturday morning. Thinking I needed a bit of exercise. So I talk Steve into taking a walk. There was this restaurant/coffee house around the corner (well, 5 blocks away, really) that we'd been meaning to try. Seemed like a good time to try it. Sadly, no, it was no longer there. It had been a coffee shop cum internet cafe cum bistro cum copy center. Now maybe they were just trying to be too much too too many, or maybe this is not the neighborhood for anything that eclectic. (The Krispy Kreme donut shop does fine two blocks in the other direction, but that is another animal entirely.) In any case they had gone out of business.

So we walked up to Market Street. There is a cute little "family restaurant" that we go to from time to time about an 8 block walk from here. They have great French toast (with a hint of cinnamon in the batter), always do the eggs and the hash browns just right, sounded like a plan for a hungry Saturday morning!

Unfortunately this morning I noticed they had Eggs Benedict on the menu. Now ordinarily I get the standard 2 eggs, hash browns, bacon, and toast and it's all good, standard fare. And they do fine at that. But the sound of EB-- Hollandaise over poached eggs and Canadian bacon or maybe even thin-sliced honey ham like I make it at home--got my tastebuds going. It was not what I got, however. LOL! Hollandaise must have been beyond their short order cook (notice that I do not call him/her a chef!) The muffins were fine, the eggs were nicely poached, the ham was "chip-chop" and the Hollandaise sauce was something I can only describe as "cheez-whiz-oid." Steve warned me I was expecting too much of this place. After scraping off the "cheese" (and I use that word loosely) I had muffins and eggs, with hash browns and bacon on the side it was my standard breakfast there. Live and learn.

So for your edification, and because perhaps the cook from the Akron Family Restaurant twill someday look this way, here is the recipe that I was expecting:

Classic Hollandaise Sauce from GourmetSleuth.com
[HOL-uhn-dayz] A rich egg based sauce flavored with a bit of lemon or vinegar, butter and a hint of cayenne pepper. The sauce is served over vegetables, fish, or Eggs Benedict.

The most important aspect of a successful sauce is to use a double boiler and make sure not to allow the water in the bottom of the double boiler to boil, just remain, hot and lightly simmering. You can add a tablespoon of cold water if needed to reduce the heat of the water if it starts to boil.

The sauce should be served immediately upon completion. Makes: 1 cup

I N G R E D I E N T S
2 tablespoons white-wine or tarragon vinegar or fresh lemon juice
4 tablespoons boiling water
3 large egg yolks
1/2 cup unsalted butter
1/4 teaspoon cayenne

1/2 teaspoon salt

I N S T R U C T I O N S

Melt the butter and keep it warm.

Heat the vinegar or lemon juice until just warmed. Have small saucepan with boiling water and a measuring tablespoon ready.

Place the top of a double boiler over (not in) hot water. (This means the bottom of the top of the double boiler should not make contact with the water heating in the bottom half of the double boiler.)

Place the egg yolks in the top of a double boiler and whisk until they begin to thicken. Now add 1 tablespoon of the boiling water. Continue to beat the sauce until it begins to thicken. Repeat with the remaining water, one tablespoon at a time, beating the mixture after each addition.

Now add the warmed vinegar or lemon juice. Remove the double boiler from the heat. Beat the sauce briskly with a wire whisk. Continue to beat the mixture as you slowly pour in the melted butter. Add the salt and cayenne and beat the sauce until it is thick. Serve immediately.


And if you are in Akron Ohio, and want a nice inexpensive breakfast, do try the Akron Family Restaurant on Market Street--just don't order the Eggs Benedict! I recommend the French Toast.

09 January 2008

New Year's Resolutions for the Good of All of Us

from 100 Ways to Save the Environment at SEQL - Sustainable Environment for Quality of Life
In Your Home – Conserve Energy

  1. Clean or replace air filters on your air conditioning unit at least once a month.
  2. If you have central air conditioning, do not close vents in unused rooms.
  3. Lower the thermostat on your water heater to 120.
  4. Wrap your water heater in an insulated blanket.
  5. Turn down or shut off your water heater when you will be away for extended periods.
  6. Turn off unneeded lights even when leaving a room for a short time.
  7. Set your refrigerator temperature at 36 to 38 and your freezer at 0 to 5 .
  8. When using an oven, minimize door opening while it is in use; it reduces oven temperature by 25 to 30 every time you open the door.
  9. Clean the lint filter in your dryer after every load so that it uses less energy.
  10. Unplug seldom used appliances.
  11. Use a microwave whenever you can instead of a conventional oven or stove.
  12. Wash clothes with warm or cold water instead of hot.
  13. Reverse your indoor ceiling fans for summer and winter operations as recommended.
  14. Turn off lights, computers and other appliances when not in use.
  15. Purchase appliances and office equipment with the Energy Star Label; old refridgerators, for example, use up to 50 more electricity than newer models.
  16. Only use electric appliances when you need them.
  17. Use compact fluorescent light bulbs to save money and energy.
  18. Keep your thermostat at 68 in winter and 78 in summer.
  19. Keep your thermostat higher in summer and lower in winter when you are away.
  20. Insulate your home as best as you can.
  21. Install weather stripping around all doors and windows.
  22. Shut off electrical equipment in the evening when you leave work.
  23. Plant trees to shade your home.
  24. Shade outside air conditioning units by trees or other means.
  25. Replace old windows with energy efficient ones.
  26. Use cold water instead of warm or hot water when possible.
  27. Connect your outdoor lights to a timer.
  28. Buy green electricity--electricity produced by low--or even zero-pollution facilities (NC Greenpower for North Carolina - http://www.ncgreenpower.org/).

In Your Home – Reduce Toxicity

  1. Eliminate mercury from your home by purchasing items without mercury, and dispose of items containing mercury at an appropriate drop-off facility when necessary (e.g. old thermometers).
  2. Learn about alternatives to household cleaning items that do not use hazardous chemicals.
  3. Buy the right amount of paint for the job.
  4. Review labels of household cleaners you use. Consider alternatives like baking soda, scouring pads, water or a little more elbow grease.
  5. When no good alternatives exist to a toxic item, find the least amount required for an effective, sanitary result.
  6. If you have an older home, have paint in your home tested for lead. If you have lead-based paint, cover it with wall paper or other material instead of sanding it or burning it off.
  7. Use traps instead of rat and mouse poisons and insect killers.
  8. Have your home tested for radon.
  9. Use cedar chips or aromatic herbs instead of mothballs.

In Your Yard

  1. Avoid using leaf blowers and other dust-producing equipment.
  2. Use an electric lawnmower instead of a gas-powered one.
  3. Leave grass clippings on the yard-they decompose and return nutrients to the soil.
  4. Use recycled wood chips as mulch to keep weeds down, retain moisture and prevent erosion.
  5. Use only the required amount of fertilizer.
  6. Minimize pesticide use.
  7. Create a wildlife habitat in your yard.
  8. Water grass early in the morning.
  9. Rent or borrow items like ladders, chain saws, party decorations and others that are seldom used.
  10. Take actions that use non hazardous components (e.g., to ward off pests, plant marigolds in a garden instead of using pesticide).
  11. Put leaves in a compost heap instead of burning them or throwing them away. Yard debris too large for your compost bin should be taken to a yard-debris recycler.

In Your Office

  1. Copy and print on both sides of paper.
  2. Reuse items like envelopes, folders and paper clips.
  3. Use mailer sheets for interoffice mail instead of an envelope.
  4. Set up a bulletin board for memos instead of sending a copy to each employee.
  5. Use e-mail instead of paper correspondence.
  6. Use recycled paper.
  7. Use discarded paper for scrap paper.
  8. Encourage your school and/or company to print documents with soy-based inks, which are less toxic.
  9. Use a ceramic coffee mug instead of a disposable cup.

Ways To Protect Our Air

  1. Ask your employer to consider flexible work schedules or telecommuting.
  2. Recycle printer cartridges.
  3. Shut off electrical equipment in the evening when you leave work.
  4. Report smoking vehicles to your local air agency.
  5. Don't use your wood stove or fireplace when air quality is poor.
  6. Avoid slow-burning, smoldering fires. They produce the largest amount of pollution.
    Burn seasoned wood - it burns cleaner than green wood.
  7. Use solar power for home and water heating.
  8. Use low-VOC or water-based paints, stains, finishes and paint strippers.
  9. Purchase radial tires and keep them properly inflated for your vehicle.
  10. Paint with brushes or rollers instead of using spray paints to minimize harmful emissions.
  11. Ignite charcoal barbecues with an electric probe or other alternative to lighter fluid.
  12. If you use a wood stove, use one sold after 1990. They are required to meet federal emissions standards and are more efficient and cleaner burning.
  13. Walk or ride your bike instead of driving, whenever possible.
  14. Join a carpool or vanpool to get to work.

Ways to Use Less Water

  1. Check and fix any water leaks.
  2. Install water-saving devices on your faucets and toilets.
  3. Don't wash dishes with the water running continuously.
  4. Wash and dry only full loads of laundry and dishes.
  5. Follow your community's water use restrictions or guidelines.
  6. Install a low-flow shower head.
  7. Replace old toilets with new ones that use a lot less water.
  8. Turn off washing machine's water supply to prevent leaks.

Ways to Protect Our Water

  1. Revegetate or mulch disturbed soil as soon as possible.
  2. Never dump anything down a storm drain.
  3. Have your septic tank pumped and system inspected regularly.
  4. Check your car for oil or other leaks, and recycle motor oil.
  5. Take your car to a car wash instead of washing it in the driveway.
  6. Learn about your watershed.

Create Less Trash

  1. Buy items in bulk from loose bins when possible to reduce the packaging wasted.
  2. Avoid products with several layers of packaging when only one is sufficient. About 33 of what we throw away is packaging.
  3. Buy products that you can reuse.
  4. Maintain and repair durable products instead of buying new ones.
  5. Check reports for products that are easily repaired and have low breakdown rates.
  6. Reuse items like bags and containers when possible.
  7. Use cloth napkins instead of paper ones.
  8. Use reusable plates and utensils instead of disposable ones.
  9. Use reusable containers to store food instead of aluminum foil and cling wrap.
  10. Shop with a canvas bag instead of using paper and plastic bags.
  11. Buy rechargeable batteries for devices used frequently.
  12. Reuse packaging cartons and shipping materials. Old newspapers make great packaging material.
  13. Compost your vegetable scraps.
  14. Buy used furniture - there is a surplus of it, and it is much cheaper than new furniture.

28 July 2007

Chai Crème Brulee

So on Friday I took a friend who was having a Birthday out to Crave, a local gourmet restaurant in Akron. He had the "Grilled Black Angus Cheeseburger with Thick Cut Onion Rings, Roasted Garlic & Parsley Aioli on a Knotted Sesame Bun," I had the "Espresso Braised BBQ Pulled Pork, with Port Salut, Creamy Caramelized Red Onion & Pineapple Slaw on a Pretzel Bun." We shared an order of "Thick Cut Rosemary and Garlic Sea Salt Fries."

But best of all was the dessert, a Chai Crème Brulee smothered in blueberries, raspberries, and blackberries and given a splash of Chai liqueur. I found, for those of you who might want to try this at home, a recipe (below) for this dish. Enjoy!


Chai Crème Brulee, Recipe courtesy Raji Jallepalli, Food Network
Show:
Cooking Live
Episode: Best of the British Isles: Indian Cuisine

1 cup Darjeeling tea leaves
12 extra large egg yolks, beaten 1 cup brown sugar 4 cups heavy cream 1 tablespoon chai spice powder 1 cup light brown sugar
Chai Spice Powder: 1 teaspoon Cardamom 1 stick Cinnamon 1/2 teaspoon black pepper corns 1/4 teaspoon whole cloves


Steep 1 cup Darjeeling tea leaves in 4 cups boiling water for 7 minutes. Strain tea leaves and reduce to 3/4 cup. Grind spice to powder. Preheat the oven to 325 degrees. In a large heat-proof mixing bowl, whisk together the egg yolks and sugar. Place the cream in a heavy bottomed saucepan over medium heat. Warm just until bubbles form around the edge. Remove from heat and, whisking constantly, pour into the egg and sugar mixture. Add the spice powder and the reduced tea liquid. Continue whisking until the sugar has dissolved and the mixture is well combined. Pour the mixture through a very fine sieve into 6 creme brulee dishes, filling them only half full. Place the dishes into a shallow baking dish large to hold them without crowding. Place the dish on the middle rack oven. Working quickly to preserve the heat, finish filling the dishes with the custard mixture, making sure that it comes right to the top of each dish. Then carefully fill the baking dish with very hot tap water so it comes halfway up the sides of the filled dishes. Bake for about 25 minutes, or until the custard is set in the center. Remove the custards to a wire rack to cool. Refrigerate for at least 3 hours, or until ready to use. When ready to serve, preheat the broiler. Pass the brown sugar through a fine sieve to eliminate all lumps. Generously sprinkle the top of each chilled custard with an equal portion of the brown sugar, taking care to cover all of the custard, so that it gives an even finish. Place the chilled creme brulee dishes under the preheated broiler and broil for about 2 minutes, or until the tops are crackling brown. Remove from the broiler and serve immediately.

29 August 2005

Chai Tiramisu

Ahhh decadence! Three of my favorite flavors together (chocolate, chai, and expresso) in my all time favorite dessert, tiramisu! This recipe came from the pages of Oregon Chai's website.

Chai Tiramisu
1 cup Oregon Chai Concentrate
20 oz. Cream Cheese
6 Tbsp. Sugar
4 Egg Yolks
1/2 cup Espresso
1/2 cup Coffee Liqueur
2 oz. Rum
1/2 tsp. Nutmeg
12 Ladyfingers
6 oz. Semi-Sweet Chocolate Chips

Beat cream cheese, sugar and egg yolks until smooth. In a microwave, heat espresso, Original Chai Concentrate, coffee liqueur, rum and nutmeg until just warm. Add the ladyfingers and soak.

Finely chop or grind chocolate chips using pulse setting on food processor or blender. Line a 9" X 5" loaf pan with plastic wrap. Place 1/2 of the lady fingers up sides and on bottom of pan. Sprinkle with 1/3 of the ground chocolate and half of the cream cheese mixture. Add a layer of ladyfingers (using 1/2 of the remaining amount) over cream cheese mix. Add another layer of 1/3 chocolate and the rest of the cream cheese mixture. Lay the remaining ladyfingers on top. Refrigerate 12 hours. Unmold and sprinkle with remaining chocolate chips.

19 July 2005

Stupid non-facts on the Internet

A friend sent me this well-meaning email about some "fun facts." Since I could see a few that were patently false I thought I'd Google someof them. When I did I found that there were hundreds of blogs out there simply repeating the same "facts," but no one who questioned any of them. I then did som REAL research (like, oh, going to an expert on the topic or going to the original source). So here are things you really SHOULD know about that “THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW” email circulating on the internet:

1. Money isn't made out of paper, it's made out of cotton.
True:
“Normal paper--including notebook paper, newspaper, construction paper-- is all made out of cellulose, which comes from trees. The trees are chemically broken down into their individual wood fibers, and the cellulose fibers are chosen and formed into very thin sheets to create paper. Paper money, on the other hand, is made from paper made of rags. Cotton or linen fabric is beaten to create cotton or linen fibers. You have probably heard of "rag paper" or "fine linen writing paper." This is where it comes from. It turns out that rag fibers bond together much more firmly than fibers in regular paper. Rag fibers are basically unaffected by water, whereas cellulose fibers absorb water and come apart when they get wet. So paper money comes through the washer just fine, while cellulose paper comes unglued.” From “How Stuff Works” http://science.howstuffworks.com/question108.htm

2. The Declaration of Independence was written on hemp paper.
False:
It was written on parchment. See: http://www.archives.gov/national_archives_experience/charters/treasure/declaration_facts.html

3. The dot over the letter i is called a "tittle".
True:
From the Oxford English Dictionary: “The dot over the letter i; a punctuation mark; a diacritic point over a letter; any one of the Hebrew and Arabic vowel-points and accents; also, a pip on dice.”

4. A raisin dropped in a glass of fresh champagne will bounce up and down continuously from the bottom of the glass to the top.
Unknown:
I can’t find a valid reference for this (anyone want to try the experiment?). I did, however, find one credible-sounding explanation on a personal website: “This is because the carbonation in the drink gets pockets of air stuck in the wrinkles of the raisin, which is light enough to be raised by this air. When it reaches the surface of the champagne, the bubbles pop, and the raisin sinks back to the bottom, starting the cycle over.” From: http://www.angelfire.com/ca6/uselessfacts/science/003.html

5. Susan Lucci is the daughter of Phyllis Diller.
False
: http://www.soapcentral.com/amc/news/991224-luccidiller.php

6. 40% of McDonald's profits come from the sales of Happy Meals.
Unknown:
But unlikely. It is possible, but according to one Business Week Daily article McDonald’s won’t give out profit breakdown stuff like that. I went through McDonald’s 2004 corporate financial statement http://www.mcdonalds.com/corp/invest/pub/2004_Financial_Report.html and could not find such info. If anyone wants to delve further into McDonald’s profits and does find the answer let me know. And here’s an interesting business article that says Happy Meals are not doing McD’s any good: http://knowledge.wharton.upenn.edu/index.cfm?fa=viewfeature&id=690.

7. 315 entries in Webster's 1996 Dictionary were misspelled.
Unknown:
And unlikely. Most large manuscripts come to the publisher with hundreds of typos in the. Copyeditors are paid to find them. Then Proofreaders are paid to find the ones the copy editors missed. By the time the book goes to print there are probably few if any errors. There are quibbles about stylistic differences (colour or color? theater or theatre?). Sometimes there is an argument to accept a newer slang spelling in a dictionary as common usage as well as the traditional spelling (thru for through, nite for night). It could be that. In the end does it matter? Some reader will point out an error to a publisher (mostly because it gives them a kick to do so) and in the next edition it will be fixed. If this even happened in 1996 it has little relevance to Webster’s as produced today.

8. The 'spot' on 7UP comes from its inventor, who had red eyes. He was albino.
False:
First of all Albino humans generally have blue eyes (albino mice have red eyes). And C. L. Grigg, the founder of 7up, was not an albino. The red dot appears on the label in the 1970s, the original label (the product was invented in 1929) was entirely red. See: http://www.snopes.com/business/names/7up.asp

9. On average, 12 newborns will be given to the wrong parents, daily.
False:
First of all this is an impossible statement. Which hospitals? Which country? Twelve daily of all babies born in the US or in the world? Do the parents know they have the wrong children? If they don’t, and thus don’t report it, then who gathered the data to make this statement—and how?

In point of fact normal hospital procedure is to put a hospital bracelet with the mother’s name on it on a baby’s wrist in the delivery room (it happened that way with all 4 of my kids). Those bracelets don’t come off until baby goes home. You’d have to have a very illiterate group of parents and hospital employees to make this kind of error.

10. Warren Beatty and Shirley MacLaine are brother and sister.
True:
But hardly news, no one ever made a secret of it. Lots of people in showbiz are related to other people in showbiz.

11. Chocolate affects a dog's heart and nervous system; a few ounces will kill a small sized dog.

True: The theobromine in chocolate can be dangerous to both dogs and cats. See: http://www.snopes.com/critters/crusader/cocoa.htm

12. Orcas (killer whales) kill sharks by torpedoing up into the shark's stomach from underneath, causing the shark to explode.
False:
First of all “exploding sharks”? Come on, people, use some common sense! Orcas do hunt prey of all sizes but they hunt and kill in packs (much like wolves), harrying their prey until it tires and then biting it. See: http://www.cetacea.org/faqs.htm.

13. Most lipstick contains fish scales.
True & False.
Only a few lipsticks contain fish scales. The ones that have “pearlesence” (as in "pearl essence"). See: http://www.straightdope.com/columns/000331.html.

14. Donald Duck comics were banned from Finland because he doesn't wear pants.
False:
Being Finnish, I have to take exception to this. As a matter of fact, DD is the most popular of all Disney characters. Every Christmas day all the Scandinavian TV channels play Disney cartoons from 3-6pm for the children to sit and watch while moms fix Christmas dinners. There is a real story behind this myth--as a budget cut Helsinki stopped buying DD comics for the kids at the youth centers. See: http://www.snopes.com/disney/films/finland.htm. American papers speculated that Donald and Daisy living together without being married had offended the Finns. The irony of that is that in Scandinavian countries most people live together for 2-3 years before getting married to be sure the relationship will work out.

15. Ketchup was sold in the 1830s as medicine.
False:
I can’t find any reference to this as a medicine, although the idea of a 19th century traveling snake-oil salesman putting ketchup in his product is not unlikely. However had any buyer known of it they would also not been fooled b the claim of medicinal qualities as it was well-known as a condiment by the 1800s. It was a sauce often imported from China and Southeast Asia.

The Oxford English Dictionary notes the earliest reference to it in the 1700s, when housewives are encouraged to add it to their stock of condiments. From the OED: “A sauce made from the juice of mushrooms, walnuts, tomatoes, etc., and used as a condiment with meat, fish, or the like. Often with qualification, as mushroom ketchup, etc. [References:] 1711 LOCKYER Acc. Trade India 128 Soy comes in Tubbs from Jappan, and the best Ketchup from Tonquin; yet good of both sorts are made and sold very cheap in China. 1748 MRS. HARRISON House-kpr.'s Pocket-bk. i. (ed. 4) 2, I therefore advise you to lay in a Store of Spices,..neither ought you to be without..Kitchup, or Mushroom Juice. 1817 BYRON Beppo viii, Buy in gross..Ketchup, Soy, Chili~vinegar, and Harvey. 1840 DICKENS Barn. Rudge (1849) 91/1 Some lamb chops (breaded, with plenty of ketchup). 1874 COOKE Fungi 89 One important use to which several..fungi can be applied, is the manufacture of ketchup.”

16. Upper and lower case letters are named 'upper' and 'lower' because in the time when all original print had to be set in individual letters, the upper case' letters were stored in the case on top of the case that stored the smaller, 'lower case' letters.
True:
See: http://www.mediumbold.com/04_thinking/type/letterform/case.html.

17. Leonardo da Vinci could write with one hand and draw with the other at the same time
False:
Da Vinci was ambidextrous. However, we have no evidence that he did left- and right-handed things simultaneously. This is an ongoing assumption that may have been a misinterpretation of the fact that he wrote with his left hand but wrote backwards so that his writing could only be read by holding it up to a mirror. See his bio at: http://www.mos.org/leonardo/bio.html.

18. Because metal was scarce, the Oscars given out during World War! II were made of wood.
False:
But close! “In support of the war effort, the Academy handed out plaster Oscar statuettes during WWII. After the war, winners exchanged the plaster awards for golden statuettes.” From: http://www.oscar.com/legacy/faq/02.html#Q9

19. There are no clocks in Las Vegas gambling casinos.
True:
According to one LV traveler, “There's a reason why casinos don't have clocks or windows and naturally they wanna keep you there long, make you forgetting the time, the longer you are there, the more you might lose.” From http://www.virtualtourist.com/travel/North_America/United_States_of_America/Nevada/Las_Vegas-836630/Warnings_or_Dangers-Las_Vegas-Casinos_Gambling-BR-1.html

20. The name Wendy was made up for the book Peter Pan; there was never a recorded Wendy before!
False:
Wendy is a diminutive for Gwendolyn, Gwennyth, and several other early Welsh name variants. What is interesting is that the author of Peter Pan, J. M. Barrie, had a god-daughter named Wendy. See: http://www.wendy.com/wendyweb/history.html.

21. There are no words in the dictionary that rhyme with: orange, purple, and silver!
False:
Though, it depends on what you mean by rhyme. Something like orange is harder to rhyme. End rhyme (the most common rhyme form) takes the last syllable of a word (in orange the would be the “ge” sound) and finds words with similar sounding endings. Orange, thus, rhymes with challenge and lozenge. Try it yourself for these words: http://www.rhymer.com/ .

22. Leonardo Da Vinci invented scissors. Also, it took him 10 years to paint Mona Lisa's lips.
False & False:
Scissors were in common use by Leonardo’s time. “Scissors were invented thousands of years ago (roughly 1500 B.C.) in ancient Egypt. Early scissors have been found in ancient Egyptian ruins. These early scissors were made from one piece of metal (unlike modern scissors, which are made from two cross-blades which pivot around a fulcrum). Modern cross-bladed scissors were invented in ancient Rome (roughly A.D. 100). Early scissors were used by clothes makers and barbers. Scissors were not in common use until much later, in the 1500's (in Europe).” From: http://www.enchantedlearning.com/inventors/indexs.shtml.

As for the Mona Lisa, Da Vinci began it in 1503 and finished it in 1506. See: http://www.ibiblio.org/wm/paint/auth/vinci/joconde/

23. A tiny amount of liquor on a scorpion will make it instantly go mad and sting itself to death.
Unknown:
But unlikely. I couldn’t track this one down yet. But the idea hardly seems logical since the position of the stinger would make this action if not impossible at least anatomically difficult. I sent an email to a scorpion expert at the University of Kentucky asking for more info and he said:

This is an old urban myth, kind of like the thing with the stripes on a wooly worm, but I don't know if anyone has scientifically proven or disproven it one way or the other. This would be a good science project for someone out west!
Sincerely,
B. Newton
University of Kentucky Entomology

24. The mask used by Michael Myers in the original "Halloween" was a Captain Kirk mask painted white.
True:
This tidbit is a really good example of why not to trust the internet. The first reference I saw when looking this up confused Halloween with Friday the 13th--and mentioned a hockey goalie mask. Not having any experience with either film myself, I didn't know the difference until a friend pointed it out. (Thanks, Gunther!) I did see the film trailer which showed the clown mask, so originally said this was a "false" fact and referred to the clown and goalie masks. (Should have followed my own rules--internet research rule #1: always go to the original source!) If you go to the films' website at: http://www.halloweenmovies.com/site/lobby.html it says:

  • "The idea was to make him almost humorless, faceless - this sort of pale visage that could resemble a human or not," said Hill. "First came a clown mask, which we all thought was eerie and scary," Wallace told Fangoria. "A clown mask really shakes you up a bit, so we knew we were on solid footing." Then came the Kirk mask. Wallace visited Burt Wheeler's Magic Shop on Hollywood Boulevard. He bought a Captain Kirk mask for $1.98, "widened the eye holes and spray-painted the flesh a bluish white. In the script it said Michael Myers' mask had 'the pale features of a human face' and it truly was spooky looking. It didn't look anything like William Shatner after Tommy got through with it."

Mea culpa!

25. If you have three quarters, four dimes, and four pennies, you have $1.19. You also have the largest amount of money in coins without being able to make change for a dollar.
True:
Do the math. But on an interesting facts scale I gotta say this is pretty useless.

26. By raising your legs slowly and lying on your back, you can’t sink in quicksand.
True:
The less weight you present to the surface of the quicksand the slower the sinking process. Laying flat you present fewer pounds per square inch. The irony is that most quicksand is only a few feet deep. Standing you are simply stuck till you dig yourself out with your hands. See: http://science.howstuffworks.com/quicksand.htm for an ineresting video on how to escape quicksand

27. The phrase "rule of thumb" is derived from an old English law, which stated that you couldn't beat your wife with anything wider than your thumb.
False:
While it was legal to “chastise” a wife in England, there has never been such a stick size law. See: http://dynamic.uoregon.edu/~jjf/essays/ruleofthumb.html

28. The first product Motorola started to develop was a record player for automobiles. At that time, the most known player on the market was the Victrola, so they called themselves Motorola.
False:
Motorola’s goal has always been to promote communications technology, by beginning with car radios, although they did produce a home tabletop phonograph: “Motorola’s role as pioneer, innovator and visionary in mobile communications is well-known. Originally founded as the Galvin Manufacturing Corporation in 1928, Motorola has come a long way since introducing its first product, the battery eliminator.” As for the name, “Galvin Manufacturing Corporation founder Paul V. Galvin created the brand name "Motorola" for the company's new car radio, linking "motor" (motorcar, motion) with the suffix "ola" (sound)” in 1930. See: http://www.motorola.com/content/0,,115-110,00.html.

29. Celery has negative calories! It takes more calories to eat a piece of celery than the celery has in it to begin with. It's the same with apples!
True & False:
Yes on celery: http://www.snopes.com/food/ingredient/celery.asp; no on the apples. Though both are far better for you that that Happy Meal above. . . .

30. Chewing gum while peeling onions will keep you from crying!
False:
It has nothing to do with gum. It is that some people find that if they breathe through their mouths rather than their noses they avoid the problem of the enzyme that causes tearing getting near the sinuses. http://www.ehow.com/tips_13796.html. Me, I close my mouth when chewing anything—wouldn’t work for me or anyone else with manners!

31. The glue on Israeli postage stamps is certified kosher.
True:
“The laws of kashrut do not apply only to actual foods, but to anything that can be ingested. For this reason, Israeli postal stamps use a glue that is certified kosher. (Glue comes from collagen, which is found in the connective tissues of animals - see gelatin for more on that topic).” From: http://www.everything2.com/index.pl?node=Kosher

32. Guinness Book of Records holds the record for being the book most often stolen from Public Libraries.
False:
Not even on the list of most frequently checked out! A list-serve for librarians lists the following as the most often stolen:

  • “The Anarchist's Cookbook and The Joy of Sex (and The Joy of Gay Sex)”
  • “anything on Witchcraft/occult (fiction AND nonfiction), Rap and Heavy metal CDs, car/truck repair manuals, GED/ASVAB/post office/police officer(!) study guides”
  • “GED exam books (ARCO, Barron's)”--“anything by or about Jim Morrison. Books about palmistry and the occult . . . Mutual Fund Forecaster and the Wall Street Journal . . . homework support books”
  • “rap music and anything by Led Zeppelin”
  • some of the above “and self-defense books”

From various emails online at: http://lists.webjunction.org/wjlists/publib/1996-May/subject.html#73831

33. Astronauts are not allowed to eat beans before they go into space because passing wind in a space suit damages it
False: They even eat beans while in space. See: http://www.space.gc.ca/asc/eng/kidspace/q&a/living_food.asp

04 July 2005

You tell 'em Heather

from Salon.com http://www.salon.com/ent/tv/review/2005/07/04/i_like/

I Like to Watch!

Sing happy birthday to a nation of nasty despots, swarthy heroes and cringing, ineffectual oddballs, from Tommy Hilfiger to Bobby Brown!

By Heather Havrilesky

July 4, 2005 | I believe I can fry!

So many years ago, this great nation of ours was born! It took a lot of blood, sweat and Big Gulps, but those courageous patriots (who were actually traitors to their own homeland, but no matter) fought for what they believed in. And what did they believe in? Freedom! Freedom from op-pres-sion. The freedom to march across tangled forests filled with dirty savages and proclaim, "All these miles of tangled forest are mine! Mine, all mine, baby!"

Imagine the freedom those courageous patriots (who were traitors back home and religious extremists to boot, but no matter) must have felt, as they chopped through those virgin forests, clearing room for their humble log cabins, the first baby steps down the path to a glimmering world of asphalt and strip malls and McMansions! Imagine the freedom those fine men must've felt as they passed out chicken-pox-infected blankies at the local powwow! How proud they must've been, returning home to their chattel and their children and their womenfolk, how proudly they must've spoken of purposely infecting the savage populace with infectious diseases! "And them that's left, we'll drive 'em West! West to the dusty Badlands where corn don't grow near as well, 'cause that's how we roll, yo!"

Today, as you gaze out at that vast and beautiful swath of Outbacks and Targets and Applebee's and Home Depots and Linens 'n' Things that butts up against the back wall of your property, as you peek through the vertical blinds and out the sliding glass doors at the blinking lights of Wal-Mart and Pier I Imports, as you sink your toes into the buttery wall-to-wall carpeting of your glorious one-bedroom condo, remember those extreme religious fanatics and their humble quest to conquer and destroy and strong-arm their way to freedom. And remember, freedom is still on the march! We've still got conquering and destroying and strong-arming to do, if we're going to bring nacho platters and Megaritas and rug and room deodorizers to those quizzical foreign peoples!

Then as now, if there are kneecaps to kick in and heads to blow off and national landmarks to destroy, that's what we'll do to make sure that there's a basket of barbecue chicken wings in every pot, and no man, woman or child grows up without fried food in his belly and piles of worthless shit packed into the closets and shelves and utility rooms of his domicile! God bless this great land of ours! Happy birthday, America, and amen!

13 December 2004

Holiday Eating Tips

The Holiday Season is upon us so listen up. . . .

1. Avoid carrot sticks. Anyone who puts carrots on a holiday buffet table knows nothing of the Christmas spirit. In fact, if you see carrots, leave immediately. Go next door where they're serving rum balls.

2. Drink as much eggnog as you can. And quickly. Like fine single-malt scotch, it's rare. In fact, it's even rarer than single-malt scotch. You can't find it any other time of the year but now. So drink up! Who cares that it has 10,000 calories in every sip? It's not as if you're going to turn into an eggnog-aholic or something. It's a treat. Enjoy it! Have one for me. Have two. It's later than you think. It's Christmas!

3. If something comes with gravy, use it. That's the whole point of gravy! Gravy does not stand alone. Pour it on. Make a volcano out of your mashed potatoes. Fill it with gravy. Eat the volcano. Repeat.

4. As for mashed potatoes, always ask if they're made with skim milk or whole milk. Or better yet, cream. If it's skim, pass. Why bother? It's like buying a sports car with an automatic transmission.

5. Do not have a snack before going to a party in an effort to control your eating. The whole point of going to a Christmas party is to eat other people's food for free. Lots of it. Hello?

6. Under no circumstances should you exercise between now and New Year's. You can do that in January when you have nothing else to do. This is the time for long naps, which you'll need after circling the buffet table while carrying a 10-pound plate of food and that vat of eggnog.

7. If you come across something really good at a buffet table, like frosted Christmas cookies in the shape and size of Santa, position yourself near them and don't budge. Have as many as you can before becoming the center of attention. They're like a beautiful pair of shoes. If you leave them behind, you're never going to see them again.

8. Same for pies. Apple. Pumpkin. Mincemeat. Have a slice of each. Or, if you don't like mincemeat, have two apples and one pumpkin. Always have three. When else do you get to have more than one dessert? Labor Day?

9. Did someone mention fruitcake? Granted, it's loaded with the mandatory celebratory calories, but avoid it at all cost! I mean, have some standards.

10. One final tip: If you don't feel terrible when you leave the party or get up from the table, you haven't been paying attention. Reread tips; start over, but hurry, January is just around the corner.

Remember this motto to live by:

"Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways, chocolate in one hand, drink of choice in the other, body thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and screaming "WOO
HOO what a ride!"

(author unknown, sent to me by a very wise-in-the-ways-of-pleasure friend,
Catriona)

12 December 2004

For all you Blue States

Found this on the internet (thanks to Lisa, and to Amy who shared it with her) and, well, it speaks to me. . . .

I've Got the Blues and Love'n It

By Ray Di Fazio

After stumbling through a few days of post-election disbelief, disappointment and denial, I now find myself feeling strangely liberated.

I've come to realize I've been worrying unnecessarily about a lot of people--e.g., young draft age folks, people in poverty, soldiers in Iraq, women at risk for unwanted pregnancy, people without health insurance, etc. -- who do not give a damn about themselves or others like them. As long as they can keep gay people from marrying, they're apparently content to live in ignorance, ambiguity and squalor, and have their children come home from Iraq without arms and legs.

When an anti-gay marriage amendment (which included removal of all civil union protections and legal rights for children of gay parents) can pass in Georgia by 79%, I can now stop worrying about helping people in that state. Clearly, the people in the "red" states have decided that poverty, war, illiteracy, job loss, no health insurance and reduced civil rights are less important than keeping Adam and Steve (or is it Steven?) from living next door.

Alabama defeated a proposition to eliminate Jim Crow era segregation language from its Constitution! That means the folks in Alabama are still undecided if African Americans are actually people!

When I learned that 99% of soldiers serving in Iraq voted for Bush again, I realized I can stop worrying about them or trying to bring them home. They are doing what they want to be doing and they voted accordingly.

If younger voters couldn't put aside their Playstations long enough to actually vote, then their choice will have consequences. If they face a draft (which is probably imminent), well, they can blame themselves.

In fact, all of these groups will have to face the consequences of their choice to support George W. Bush. Thankfully, I can breathe a sigh of relief. They will get exactly what they wanted.

I think us "blue" voters should stop trying to reason with the unreasonable and encourage like minded blue people to leave those red states. Let's invite them to California or to the rest of the blue states. Let them bring their creativity, economic clout, compassion, charity, tolerance, ideas, belief in science, etc. to states which think rationally and leave the rest of the freaks to fend for themselves.

What? Your trailer park in south Florida got swept away by a tornado and you need food, clothing and donations? Sorry. Don't look at me. Ask the red neck next door to put down his six pack and get you a money order and bail you out.

We are often discouraged because we continue to look to these people to have a light bulb moment -- but let's face it: it's not going to happen. There will be no epiphany. They will not realize their own hypocrisy. They will never realize that democracy applies to everyone. They will never understand that poverty and ignorance damages a society beyond belief. They will never acknowledge that a personal belief in God is just that, a personal belief, not a legislative one. They will never acknowledge that a single mom choosing between paying the electric bill and providing medical care for her child is not a moral failing on her part, but on society's.

There's an expression that says you should never wrestle with a pig, because the pig likes it and you just end up getting dirty. Sounds a little crazy, right? I've never felt more free.

Life is tough. It's tougher if you're stupid.



02 August 2004

Heinz Catsup

Just recently one of my cousins sent an email around the family telling us all that we should boycott Heinz products because of John Kerry and his wife Theresa Heinz-Kerry. In part the post blamed Kerry for the (NAFTA related) move of a Heinz plant to Mexico; and it also implied the purchase of Heinz catsup would put money in the pockets of the Democratic candidate for President. The discussion that ensued turned out to be a enlightening example of why you should never take a political statement at face value.

Happily I seem to have raised daughters who refused to make snap judgements without checking for facts. Gillianne, the youngest, went online to check out the Heinz company. Here are her comments:

"Don't change your mind too quickly... Or not for the forwarded reasons. I looked up the Heinz company website (http://www.heinz.com/) and they had the following statement posted under their "newsroom" link: In light of some misleading speculation, the H. J. Heinz Company would like to make clear that neither Mrs. Teresa Heinz Kerry, Senator John Kerry nor any member of their family is involved in the management or board of the H. J. Heinz Company (NYSE:HNZ). They have no involvement in the Heinz® Ketchup business or any of the company’s other brands or products.The H. J. Heinz Company, in accordance with its corporate governance policies, is a nonpartisan organization."

She further found out that Ms. Heinz-Kerry & the entire Heinz family has less than 4% stock in the corporation, that since 1987 there have been no Heinz family members in control positions in the company, and that over the last seven years the Heinz company has actually donated more to Republican campaigns ($96,000) than to Democratic campaigns ($54,000).

Hmmmm. Maybe you ought to boycott that catsup after all. I would, but I don't use it. I buy an organic catsup called "Muir Glen" from the health food store. It tastes far better than Heinz.